Monday, May 23, 2011

Decision Made

A huge burden has been lifted from my shoulders. I feel imminently lighter.

The Mad Scientist and I finally came to a decision as to whether to send TRex to kindergarten in the fall.  I have been worrying about this decision and how it can alter the rest of TRex's life for months now. I've fretted over whether holding him back will be the correct choice or whether sending him would do better in the end.  I have been changing my mind minute by minute.

That is not me. I'm usually very good about making decisions. I think very quickly and decisions are made and finalized before others even knew there was something to decide, but I fretted over whether to send TRex to kindergarten. I asked every person I could think of with an opinion. I read and read and read article after article. I debated the pros and cons. Each time, the decision was too close to call. When it came down to it, the part of the decision that weighed heaviest on my mind, nobody could give me an answer.

Ultimately, the Mad Scientist and I had to decide whether we thought TRex would be emotionally stable enough to make it through kindergarten while his sister was in the hospital. I still don't know if he is stable enough. But through all of my searching, I learned, that he may never be stable enough. He is a very empathetic little boy, who cares for his sister more than anything in the world. When she is in the hospital, it hurts him in his core. I don't think giving him a year will change that. He will only care for his sister more as time goes by (as we all do). So, I took that out of the equation.  Once that part of the question was pushed aside, the answer became easy.

TRex will go to kindergarten in the fall. He will turn five a couple of weeks before classes start.  And he is very excited. He may struggle at some point being one of the younger kids in class, but a good friend reminded me that he is lucky enough to have educated parents, who can and will provide him any help needed.  For now, I think he will do great. He is a smart kid with tons of potential and he wants to learn. Pre-k wouldn't provide him the structure or challenge that he desires. How could I hold him back?

For now, I'm very happy having this decision made and done with. In a couple of months, I may start to freak out with the thought of my baby in kindergarten, but for today, I'm good.


  1. Congrats on your big decision! Ok, so now I need to know what elementRy you plan to send him to and why. I've started thinking the tiniest bit about that, and I hear that all the schools in our city are pretty different.

  2. I think it will work out fine. I know that getting The Fruit Loop into the school system at age 3 was the best thing ever for him, even though he *hated* it at first. But he has made SO much progress being in PPCD for two years, Pre-K, and then Kinder this year. I couldn't even imagine if I had waited until this year to start him in school. Plus, even though he has a sibling, it will be awesome for him to have lots of new friends that he can see every day. *Wishing TRex all the luck in getting the best teacher ever!*

  3. Wishing you all the best of luck! I know it is hard when they are at school when their sibling is in the hospital. We have struggled with that with Wyatt but ultimately it has been good for him to have the school system because the counselor and the teachers have been amazing to help him get through those tough days. I would recommend you work closely with the guidance counselor of his elementary school so she/he can keep a close eye on him and work on activities with him to help get him through it.

  4. He'll do fantastic. I was the youngest in my class too but knowing he has yall he'll be fine! It could be a great distraction for him.


Having a child with a CHD is like being given an extra sense---the true ability to appreciate life. Each breath, each hug, each meal is a blessing when you've watched your child live off a ventilator, trapped in an ICU bed, being fed through a tube. Each minute is a miracle when you've watched your child almost die and come back to you.
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