Monday, September 17, 2012

Ack Attack

Her name was Kayme (pronounced K Me). She was my imaginary friend between the ages of 4 and 6 (I think). She wasn't around long (that I remember) and eventually, she had an ack attack and never came back. At least, that is the story I've been told. At one point, I announced that Kayme had an ack attack and never came back.

I haven't thought of Kayme for years.  But then, the Dancing Queen became enamored with the Pinkalicious books. And in "Goldilicious", we meet Pinkalicous's imaginary unicorn. Last night, after reading "Goldilicous" for the billionth time in a week, TRex asked what an imaginary friend was. I explained and he asked if kids had imaginary friends. So I told him about Kayme.

Fast forward to tonight, when read "Goldilicious" again because it was DQ's choice. After the story, TRex asked me why Kayme never came back after her ack attack. I responded that kids grow out of their imaginary friends and when Kayme had her ack attack, I must have outgrown her.

TRex then wanted to know if an ack attack really was a heart attack. I told him truthfully that I didn't remember, but when I was older and was told the stories of Kayme, I suspected it was a heart attack.

He left it at that and went off to bed.

After I tucked in DQ and went to kiss TRex, he asked me why I didn't try to save Kayme from her heart attack. He didn't understand how I could let her go. Why didn't I call my dad to save her? Didn't I want to play with her any more? I tried to explain that imaginary friends don't last forever and I had other real kids to play with.

Then, we got to the meat of the matter. TRex wanted to know why someone wouldn't be saved when they had a heart attack. I had to explain that sometimes there was nothing to be done. He wanted to know exactly how and why a person could have a heart attack.

Then he was silent for a while.

He looked up at me and asked "Mommy, did DQ have a heart attack?"

No, honey, she never had a heart attack.

The relief on his face was palpable. And luckily for me, he never asked the next question.

Something tells me that I won't be so lucky in the near future.

1 comment:

  1. Ugh. Knife in the gut. *hugs to you guys* (I can't think of anything else to say...)

    ReplyDelete

Having a child with a CHD is like being given an extra sense---the true ability to appreciate life. Each breath, each hug, each meal is a blessing when you've watched your child live off a ventilator, trapped in an ICU bed, being fed through a tube. Each minute is a miracle when you've watched your child almost die and come back to you.
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